Hello Sailor

Ahoy! Hoist your freak flag at the PUMA Yard, 'Cubic Lust,' Dick Slap, Skratchpad, Metro Area, Danny Krivit, more parties this week 

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Seattle's DJ Nark will Dick Slap us.

SUPER EGO A "yacht" sounds like something I spit up after huffing too much Air Wick Crisp Linen Room Freshener, but apparently it's that boat from the Duran Duran "Rio" video? And America's Cup isn't a Simon Cowell-produced fantasy half-naked athletic protectivewear "talent" contest? Harumph. Well, at least we get a party out of it. In all the boat-race branding hysteria, the people at PUMA are pulling together two months of neato, free, and yuppie-free lineups of daytime and evening parties at its America's Cup PUMA Yard temporary space at Pier 27. Hip-hop queen Jeanine Da Feen on Thu/8, Dub Mission's J-Boogie and Sep on Sat/10, Sweater Funk on Sun/11, etc. — all the way through September. Check this thing out: www.pumayardsf.com.

 

'CUBIC LUST'

You know, us nightlife folks aren't just stunningly pretty faces, here for you to pump full of drugs and good music and then have your way with us, please! Some of us also write books. (Those are like blogs without Google AdSense). Revered DJ Gavin Hardkiss has written a steamy erotic volume about partying in Hong Kong entitled Cubic Lust, and will be reading from it and spinning records at the long-running Qoöl Happy Hour, now at Harlot.

Wed/7, 6pm-10pm, free. Harlot, 46 Minna, SF. www.cubiclust.com

 

SKRATCHPAD 10-YEAR ANNIVERSARY BATTLE

Hot hip-hop vinyl on the decks, four nimble-fingered finalists from up and down the West Coast, a slew of nice gear to the winner, and enough turntable pyrotechnics to heat your summer — hey, all that scratching is making me itch. Johnny Krush hosts, with special guests Teeko, Derrick D, Genie G, DJ Pone, and more.

Thu/8, 9pm-1am, free. Neck of the Woods, 406 Clement, SF. www.skratchpadworldwide.com

 

METRO AREA

Brooklyn-based duo Morgan Geist and Darshan Jesrani, known as Metro Area, traffic in recombinant house textures and live improvisation, building new grooves out of the classic, funky dance floor samples, sounds, and feelings rattling around in the back of your mind. Opening: Christina Chatfield, one of our most exciting techno talents, also performing live.

Fri/9, 9pm-4am, $10–$20. Mighty, 119 Utah, SF. www.mighty119.com

 

DANNY KRIVIT

One of the true masters — and one of my all-time faves, natch. You probably know Mr. Krivit as one-third of the NYC Body and Soul consortium, a DJ unafraid to indulge in the deep-jazz side of house, providing a colorful canvas for complex footwork. Disco and Latin grooves are on the palette, too, as well as some surprising applications of Detroit techno.

Sat/10, 10pm-4am, $10. Mighty, 119 Utah, SF. www.mighty119.com

 

DICK SLAP

A gaggle of freaky-sexy gays — a gaygle, even — will descend upon the Eagle (fast becoming a nightlife go-to beyond its legendary Sunday Beer Bust and Thursday Night Live) for a night of frenzied, furry fun. It's all courtesy of Seattle's cute DJ Nark and his raucous Dick Slap crew, but local DJs P-Play and Robert Jeffrey will hit you upside, too.

Sat/10, 9pm, $5. SF Eagle, 398 12th St., SF. dickslaplyfe.tumblr.com

 

SUNSET BOAT PARTY

All aboard for this Sunset party crew annual tradition — this time featuring Toronto's awesome Stuart Li, aka Basic Soul Unit, who'll rock us with sparkling house grooves, with jackmaster Sean Hernandez, aka Chicago Skyway, warming up.

Sun/11, 5pm-11pm, $55. San Francisco Spirit, Pier 3, SF. www.tinyurl.com/sunsetboat2013

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